There isn't really much going on in my life here and i'm looking forward to going back to Aussie to pick up whatever's left of it. It has nearly been 3 years since i've left this place and looking back, i wonder how life would have treated me had i not chosen to leave everything familiar behind in pursuit of my dreams. It is weird how things have become so strange. But then again, maybe i am the strange one. Everyone has moved on to scale greater heights while i haven't changed a bit. It is ironical but at a time like this, i wish i can take a break (and that is a really laughable thing to say considering the fact that i'm supposed to be enjoying my summer vacation now). Take a break from the person i am now i guess......

There is a lot of happiness revolving around me and i feel blessed that i can at least tap into other people's happiness to fill the void in my life. I am happy that many people around me are moving on to newer terrain...and i guess in a way, i am envious. Everyone has been moulded (for the better or worse) through their life experiences, while i am still stagnant in my own naive world, thinking everything will be okay and i'll fit in somehow. I dull my feelings for fear that they may seem irrelevant...so much so that i'm not sure what i feel anymore. I'll just accept whatever comes my way...and do whatever's appropriate i guess. I am numb to whatever blows people deal me with. I rather just be inert and see where the tide takes me to.

It's a pity that i won't be able to celebrate my birthday in singapore this year. I love birthdays and presents...as much as i did 20 years ago. It was always the same old thing back then - my favourite kueh lapis and kiddy pressies (for some reason, it was always van houten chocolates). I haven't lost that stupid habit of looking forward to my birthday yet, but i guess with time, nothing is the same anymore. For one, i know that i wouldn't be receiving my birthday kueh lapis this year......Anyway, it is a damn coincidence that my birthday this year falls right smack on the first day of school. Hopefully, i would have already gotten my new car by then and that should be enough consolation for me.

There is such a thing as an infrared port right? I hope i didn't make a fool out of myself by telling someone that data can be transferred between 2 computers without using cables. Erm...right? Right.

I haven't been making use of my JVC recently and the only few pictures i've taken are shots of baby Tiffy. She has really grown up and will be visiting me and Aussie at the end of the year (ok i know that is quite a long time from now). I guess when life and people leave you behind, the only thing anyone can do is to make plans for the future and look forward to what's to come......

It's a surprise how much i still can babble despite the fact that i'm sick and feeling down and out.

Edit: All Harry Potter fans alert! The 5th book "The Order of the Phoenix" is scheduled to be published on the 21st of June in the UK, USA and Australia, according to Bloomsbury Publishing. Apparently, it is also the same in Singapore. Yippeee! My semester timetable for 2003 states that my S1 exams end officially on the 20th, which means wherever i am, i can still lay my hands on the book and read it guilt-free, exam-free!