My Best Friend and I

If you can start the day without caffeine,

If you can get going without painkillers,

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pain,

If you can resist complaining,and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you any time,

If you can forgive a friend's lack of consideration,

If you can overlook it when those you love take it out on you when, through no fault of your own something goes wrong,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,

If you can ignore a friend's limited education and never correct him,

If you can resist treating a rich friend better than a poor friend,

If you can face the world without lies and deceit,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

If you can honestly say that deep in your heart, you have no prejudice against creed or colour, religion or politics, then my friend, you're almost as good as your dog.

Almost, but not quite.